


In Which the Wardens Try Smut

by Kahlan_20



Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Epic Fail, F/M, and romantic, and sexy, they are trying so hard, to be cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-04 07:04:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10985877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kahlan_20/pseuds/Kahlan_20
Summary: Alistair and Tabris are reunited. Lovers, friends, forever. They are ready to be one after such a long time apart. Too bad neither one of them is good at this.





	In Which the Wardens Try Smut

“What happened here?” Alistair asked, gently tracing the bright red, barely-healed wound that marked where the tip of Tabris’s ear had been sliced cleanly off. Tabris’s ear twitched, dislodging his hand.

“Didn’t dodge quite quick enough,” she replied lightly, as she gathered up messy, thick black hair into the worst bun Alistair had ever seen, held in place by a messily-tied leather cord. She grinned at him, hands still tangled in her hair, pink lips parting and re-opening a small split on her lip, dripping pink onto ivory teeth, stretching the scar to the left of her nose. Hidden dimples revealed themselves, her emerald eyes lit up in a way Alistair hadn’t seen in a long time, and he felt himself fall in love a little more.

He grabbed the back of her head, smashing his face into hers, belatedly realizing that that probably hadn’t helped her lip. Pushing her back a pace, he began to unlace the front of her short jacket, pulling the leather cording from the holes, sliding the brown sleeves over freckled shoulders, and letting it plummet to the floor. 

It clanked as it hit the ground. Tabris winced. Alistair stared at the now-foreboding jacket for a moment, then – 

“Please tell me you aren’t armed.”

She shot him a pitying look. “Of course I’m fucking armed.” 

Alistair heaved a long-suffering sigh, then grinned ruefully. “Just tell me if I’m about to get a hand cut off,” and he reached for her make-shift belt, a bolt of red fabric wound several times around her hips and tied off on her side. He quickly untied it, and prepared to spin Tabris around and watch the belt unwind from around her and 

“You’re about to get a hand cut off.” Alistair groaned, then much more carefully unwound the belt from her waist, once again letting fabric drop with a small clank. Then, Alistair was able to grab Tabris’s hips and forcefully spin her around. She staggered for a few steps until she hit the edge of the bed. 

“You know,” she began thoughtfully, “I cannot believe we are actually about to do it in a bed.” Alistair snorted, fumbling with the cording tied at the center of Tabris’s back, holding the corset-like garment firm. He recovered quickly, and deftly untied the bow and looped the extra cording around both handing, playfully pulling the lacing tighter. Tabris inhaled, short and breath cut off, then laughed shallowly around the vise. She reached behind and gabbed his hand, rubbing his knuckles with her thumb. Alistair held the cording in place for a moment more, telling her “you look ready to face the Orlesian court.” They both exploded in laughter as he let go of the cording and the corset loosened, allowing for better breathing. Alistair reached for the corset again, taking a moment to trace her spine, and then pulling at the center of each of the laced X’s, going up and down from where the cording was originally tied, loosening the corset until Tabris was able to shimmy out of it. It fell and joined the other garments, and her brown leather travel dress visibly loosened around her, no longer restricted, now gently outlining hips and softening her overall figure. She pulled off her shoulder-length fingerless gloves, revealing more freckles down her arms, and let them join the corset. She turned, and looked Alistair up and down. 

“Well, now I feel underdressed.” 

Alistair had never shed his own garments so fast, and he quickly found out there was a reason for that. Tabris’s laughter followed his own ass to the floor. “Just be happy,” he grunted, pulling off his second boot and then his trousers off the rest of the way, balling them up and tossing them at Tabris’s clothing pile, “that I wasn’t walking around in armor. It would have been exceedingly uncomfortable for me by the time we reached the room.”

Tabris laughed again, eyes dark in want, and crossed her arms over her chest, each hand reaching the opposite shoulder and flicking the sleeve off. She shimmied out of the dress, it dropping to a puddle on the floor; and gracefully stepped out of the pile of fabric, flinging the whole thing to the side with a flick of her foot.

 

Hand on her hip, she sent Alistair an impassive look, standing proud only in smalls. The moment was broken as she grinned, “I’ve been practicing that one.” She surged forward, lips locking with his and teeth clacking, both out of practice with the romance. They spun one-eighty, and she fell backwards onto the bed, Alistair falling on top of her before balancing on his forearms to lift his weight off. She crab walked backwards up towards the pillow, Alistair following with a wicked grin, before they met once more in a wet kiss. 

Alistair’s hands were all over her back, stroking up and down and up as he kissed her lips, her chin, her neck, her chest, between her breasts, her diaphragm, her stomach, until he grabbed the top of her underwear with his teeth and made a movement to deftly pull them off, only for the maneuver to not work and his face to pound directly into her lower belly. 

Tabris groaned, and curled up.

“Oh Andraste’s left tit, I thought that would work, I thought it would be sexy!”

“In what world would that ever work?” Tabris groaned, one visible bright green eye slowly reddening with tears.

“I’m sorry! I got caught up in the moment!”

Alistair groaned, and flumped down on the bed, back down. He eyed Tabris, still curled up but one eye balefully looking at him. “Is the mood totally ruined?”

Tabris uncurled a bit, both eyes visible and staring at him, unreadable. 

She jumped forward in a new attack.

**Author's Note:**

> I thought I would write actual, detailed smuttiness and it just didn't want to happen.


End file.
